Reasons why you don't want to be 'perfect'

The word perfect means "having all the required or desirable elements, qualities, or characteristics; as good as it is possible to be" and I don't want to be that. The second you are perfect in someone's eyes, that means that you are the best they possibly see you as in that moment and that in itself terrifies me because I don't want a certain version of myself to be "as good as it is possible to be". I want to constantly be developing and growing and showing someone a new version of myself they can love as we learn more about each other. I don't want to be perfect because that means I will subconsciously always be trying to repeat that same outfit or hair or characteristics that someone said is perfect and therefore not be the truest version of myself I could be.

I do have to admit that I've spent most of my life trying to be the perfect person, the perfect student, perfect dancer, perfect girlfriend. Until more recently, i noticed that all of that is an impossible goal to achieve because everyone's version of perfection is different, so I could be perfect in my eyes and from someone else's perspective I am a complete mess.

Here are reasons why you shouldn't want to be "perfect" for anyone:

You'll be a more rounded person

If you are only striving to be perfect in one art, one hobby, one topic, one recipe, then you will never be able to experience all life has to offer. You will be seen as linear and impractical or even in some cases, unintelligent. It's impossible to be a perfectionist at everything and holding yourself to that high of a standard is unhealthy and damaging meantally and sometimes even physically.

Our definition of perfect changes as we grow older

As we grow into adults, our version of what perfect is morphs over time. What we once wanted is no longer what we want many times and therefore when looking at perfectionism, it's a similar concept. At the end of the day, you should strive to be happy, not perfect. The second you place yourself or others on a pedestal is the moment you lose touch with reality and with the thing that makes you human; mistakes and failure. Your definition of perfection should constantly be changing because that means you are growing and developing into a more understanding and experienced person.

You are allowed to make mistakes

Mistakes and failures are what make us learn and grow. Without failures or falling, how would we know where to go next? Sometimes we have to let go of the way we wanted our lives to look like and instead be grateful for the many blessings and failures that have come our way so that we could end up with what we have. Everything in life happens for a reason and when referring to trying to keep everything perfect and controlled, it's even more important to remember that. If you had gotten what you wwwanted when you were younger when your high school sweetheart was your definition of perfect, would you still be happy now? Odds are you wouldn't be and that's why our mistakes and failed relationships, schooling etc. are important because they have morphed us into the current amazing version of ourselves we are today.

It is difficult to form friendships an relationships

If you expect perfection out of yourself then there are is a high chance you also expect it out of others. This is a difficult road to go down because you will always hold others to the same standards you hold yourself which will only lead to disappointment over time. Friendships and relationships with people are expected to ebb and flow and are supposed to be buil on sympathy and love and understanding that it is not the other person's responsibility to show up for you every single time you have a tear.

Striving to be perfect will only lead to disappointment

If you are always saying that you have to be perfect and once you are perfect then you will be happy, I can promise you that happiness will not last long. Perfection is difficult to achieve and even harder to maintain. You will live a life of constant rejection and disappointment if you expect 100% from yourself every time. You can't pour happiness and love into other people's cups if you yourself don't have compassion and empathy for yourself. Keep your head high and strive for your goals and dreams of course, but don't beat yourself up for falling short sometimes.