Facing your Feelings

My whole life I have been the person who every time I’d get upset I would open the back-porch door and go run. I would run until my lungs felt like they were on fire and now has translated in my adult life; I cycle until my legs shake or run at the park until I can’t breathe. Another way I would avoid facing my feelings would be by booking the soonest trip, using my Southwest and Marriott points to book some insane trip that would magically fill the void; spoiler it didn’t. While there are worse ways to cope with heartbreak and challenges, I never really processed my feelings. Simply running from person to person and keeping my calendar as full as possible in order to avoid silence. If I avoided silence and down time then I could be happy right?

I’ve learned that if you keep searching for happiness or temporary distractions in other people then two things will happen. You will hurt others unintentionally, therefore causing a ripple effect as well as you will end up in an even worse low than you were in originally. Fix your mind before opening it to others romantically. At the end of the day, hurt people, hurt people.

Sadly, after reading one too many self-help books, I have come to the awful realization that healing and moving on does not come from distractions or from how well you can avoid or brush over your feelings. The true healing and relief come after you have fully processed your feelings and truly endured the pain that was brought to you. The relief and peace you will feel after you have healed will be worth the sacrifice and pain and will in the end make you a stronger, more capable individual. If you don’t heal properly because you don’t face your feelings, you can become closed off or just continue the hurt cycle and keep attracting the same type of people who will hurt you.